Balakrishna Facts

What can Balayya do?

1. Balayya makes onions cry

2. Balayya can delete the Recycle Bin.

3. Ghosts are actually caused by balayya killing people faster than Death can process them.

4. Balayya can build a snowman..... out of rain.

5. Balayya can strangle you with a cordless phone.

6. Balayya can drown a fish.

7. When Balayya enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

8. When Balayya looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Balayya and Balayya.

9. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Balayya can throw Brett Favre even further.

10. The last digit of pi is Balayya. He is the end of all things.

11. Balayya does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.

12. Bullets dodge Balayya.

13. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Balayya and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

14.Balayya' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Balayya

15. If you spell Balayya wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Balayya? " It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

16. Balayya can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

17. Once a cobra bit Balayya' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

18. When Balayya gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

19. Balayya can kill two stones with one bird.

20. Balayya was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

21. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Balayya can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

22. There is no such thing as global warming. Balayya was cold, so he turned the sun up.

23. Balayya can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

24. Balayya has a deep and abiding respect for human life? unless it gets in his way.

25. It takes Balayya 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

26. Balayya once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

27. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Balayya could use to kill you, including the room itself.

27. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Balayya.

28. Balayya destroyed the periodic table, because Balayya only recognizes the element of surprise.

29. Balayya got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.

30. With the rising cost of gasoline,Balayya is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.

31. The square root of Balayya is pain. Do not try to square Balayya, the result is death.

32. When you say "no one's perfect", Balayya takes this as a personal insult."

Economy travel

Most Dangerous Runways in the World

This is GULF

* Local calls are free
* Petrol is cheaper than water, Payment for drainage too
* Any building construction finishes in 3 months
* Unqualified get more salary than Qualified
* Show-off matters more than real quality & performance
* Laborers are paid less than what they can earn back in their own country
* Companies can kick out their employees without any reason
* Wastas (recommendation) are more powerful than money
* Cleaners have more Wasta than officers
* Watchman has more Rights than the Building Owner
* Office boy / Tea boy & Drivers have more influence on Boss than Manager
* Gulf climate changes so fast, in one hour u can see raining, dust storm, hot / humid / chilling weather
* Gulf is located in desert, still u find greenery everywhere
* If u can't earn money in the Gulf, u can't earn anywhere in the world
* In Gulf, time goes very fast, Friday to Friday comes u never know, its sooo fast
* Every bachelor has a dream of getting married and buying a house in Canada
* U love your parents, friends, relatives 100 times more than when you were together
* Being at home is more painful than being at work
* Indians appear/pretend to be more religious/God fearing than they really are
* Theaters are full of Arab nationals whenever there is a movie of Salman / Sharukh
* Gulf girls sing Hindi songs but don't understand anything
* A ladies hair saloon every 5 meters
* Food/Grocery delivery to the car
* A Starbucks every 10 meters
* Hard Rock Cafe with no alcohol


* In one single flat sharing with 5 families
* A Shopping Mall located every 2 km
* Highway lanes differentiated for slow & fast drivers
* Getting a license is more difficult than buying a car
* Smashed cars are more than bugs
* Parking charge: 2 Dirham for 1 hour - 5 Dirham for 2 hours & so on
* No Queues for women
* Have to spend 75% in Office and 25% in Home per day

TRAFFIC SIGNAL IN GULF:

* GREEN : Signal to go for Indians and Afrikans
* YELLOW : Signal to go for Egyptians and Pakistanis, Americans, Europeans
* RED : Signal to go for Kuwaitis, Saudis , Palestinians & Lebanese

The Donkey and the Dog (Good Moral)

The Donkey and the Dog - Read and think and read the Disclaimer too :

There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog. One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was fast asleep too but the donkey and the dog were awake. The dog decided not to bark since the master did not take good care of him and wanted to teach him a lesson.

The donkey got worried and said to the dog that if he doesn't bark, the donkey will have to do something himself. The dog did not change his mind and the donkey started braying loudly.

Hearing the donkey bray, the thief ran away, the master woke up and started beating the donkey for braying in the middle of the night for no reason.
 

Moral of the story "One must not engage in duties other than his own".

Now take a new look at the same story...

The washer man was a well educated man from a premier management institute. He had the fundas of looking at the bigger picture and thinking out of the box. He was convinced that there must be some reason for the donkey to bray in the night. He walked outside a little and did some fact finding, applied a bottom up approach, figured out from the ground realities that there was a thief who broke in and the donkey only wanted to alert him about it. Looking at the donkey's extra initiative and going beyond the call of the duty, he rewarded him with lot of hay and other perks and became his favorite pet. 

The dog's life didn't change much, except that now the donkey was more motivated in doing the dog's duties as well. In the annual appraisal the dog managed "ME" (Met Expectations) .

Soon the dog realized that the donkey is taking care of his duties and he can enjoy his life sleeping and lazing around.

The donkey was rated as "star performer". The donkey had to live up to his already high performance standards.
 

Soon he was over burdened with work and always under pressure and now is looking for a NEW JOB ...

Disclaimer*: All characters in the story are 'not at all' imaginary. Any resemblance to person living or dying of work is 'purely intentional'

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