Dreams

A wonderful article on Dreams.

Time Constraints

An engineer crosses a road when a frog calls out to him, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."

He bends over, picks up the frog and puts it in his pocket. The frog speaks up again and says, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The engineer takes the frog out of his pocket, smiles at it and returns it to the pocket.

The frog then cries out, "If you kiss me and turn me back, I'll do whatever you say!"

Again the engineer takes the frog out, smiles at it and puts it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asks, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, I'll stay with you for a month and do whatever you say. What more do you want?"

The engineer says, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool!"

A question that makes you think is worth asking…

At the cusp of a new day, week, month, or year, most of us take a little time to reflect on our lives by looking back over the past and ahead into the future.  We ponder the successes, failures and standout events that are slowly scripting our life’s story.  This process of self reflection helps us maintain a conscious awareness of where we’ve been and where we intend to go.  It is pertinent to the organization and preservation of our dreams, goals and desires... 

Copy Paste

One girl went to a electronic shop with anger and threw her new laptop on the desk at a person from whom he bought. She told the salesman that you have... cheated me. I cannot transfer file from my previous laptop.. 

Salesman: Madam, can you please try in front of me. 
This is what she did, 
1) Right clicked the mouse on the file selected CUT option. 
2) Disconnected the mouse 
3) Took that mouse carefully and connected it to the new PC. 
4) Right clicked the mouse and selected the PASTE option. 

Salesman DIED

The 3 Envelopes

A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing. On the last day the departing manager tells him, "I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if you encounter a crisis you can't solve."

Three months down the track there is a major drama, everything goes wrong - the usual stuff - and the manager feels very threatened by it all. He remembers the parting words of his predecessor and opens the first envelope. The message inside says "Blame your predecessor!" He does this and gets off the hook.

About half a year later, the company is experiencing a dip in sales, combined with serious product problems. The manager quickly opens the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize!" This he does, and the company quickly rebounds.

Three months later, at his next crisis, he opens the third envelope.
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.
.
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The message inside says "Prepare three envelopes".

Catholic Sardarji

Each Friday night after work, Sardar would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a Tandoori Chicken and some meat Kebabs. But all of his neighbors were strict Catholics ... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating Chicken and Meat on a Friday.

The delicious aroma from the grilled meats was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their Priest.

The Priest came to visit Sardar and suggested that he become a Catholic. After several classes and much study, Sardar attended Mass... and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, You were born a Sikh, and raised a Sikh, but now, you are a Catholic."

Sardar's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived. The wonderful aroma of tandoori chicken and meat kebabs filled the neighborhood.

The Priest was called immediately by the neighbors and, as he rushed into Sardar's backyard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement!

There stood Sardar, holding a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meats and chanted: "Oye, you were born a chicken, and you were born a lamb, you were raised a chicken and you were raised a lamb, but now you are a Potato and Tomato"..!

Priest fainted….

Stupid Questions People Ask

And some equally ridiculous replies :-)

1. When people c u lying down, with your eyes closed they still ask:- r u sleeping?
No! Em trying 2 die.

2. When It's raining & some1 notices u going out, they ask: - r u going out in dis rain?
No,in the next 1.

3. Ur friend calls your home phone:- Where r u?
At the bus stop!

4. They see u wet coming 4m the bathroom:- Did u just have a bath?
No, I fell in the toilet bowl!

5. U r standing rite in front of the elevator on the ground floor & they ask: Going up?
No, no, em waiting 4 my apartment 2 come down & get me.

6.  you are on the queue 2 buy tickets 4 the cinema, a friend sees u & asks:- what r u doing here?
Am here 2 pay my university fee..! :-D